Last night I had a brief exchange with Kurt Wild on Twitter that ended up rather poorly, and I was branded as as sock puppet of Damon Krueuzer’s. The big piece of evidence was that my site was alleged to be run on the same server; the truth is that I host my site on, and so does Kruezer. And so do some 39 million others.

My conundrum is that I want to remain anonymous.

There’s not much point in trying to claim this, but I am not Damon Kruezer, and I have nothing to do with him. I’m aware of who he is only because his site popped up in a search when I was looking for some information on a Michael Lucas lawsuit and he happened to have blogged about it. It says something about his site that he showed up in a search at all; he must be getting some traffic for the linkage in google, since the site is formatted so poorly and updated sporadically, from what I can tell. I followed his site for a short while, but frankly it grew tedious when he got involved with Mark Wilson at Great Atlantic Media. It’s not the side of the business I’m interested in writing about; I try to keep out of model drama, and only, foolishly, spoke up when I saw something objectionable — but more on that in a moment.

Nevertheless, you can’t prove a negative, so I’ll leave it at that. Believe me or not; you don’t want to follow me? Don’t. My blog is about the business side of the industry, and I’ve written about such fabulously interesting topics as why Titan Media pulled its content from AEBN, and why AVN should give up trying when it comes to the gay market. I don’t even post any explicit pictures that aren’t incidental to my topic, such as when I posted on Falcon using the term “bareback” instead of the more accurate — true — term, “pre-condom.” Wow, I’m sure you can start to see the similarities between what I’ve written and the crap gossip on KAN.

Since last night I’ve been amused that I’ve been thinking about “coming out” on my blog. I haven’t thought about coming out for 20 years, and the flood of memories… oh, another post perhaps. Regardless, I’ve decided to remain anonymous for a couple of reasons.

First, I work in the gay porn business in San Francisco. My views are my own, and they are not in accordance with my colleagues nor the company where I work. I don’t want or need their stamp of approval on my views, and likewise, I don’t want to associate the views I express here, with them. Out of respect for them, I remain unattached in so far as this blog.

Second, my views need no imprimateur to be valid or worthy of expression. In fact, sometimes an opinion piece has more punch when you aren’t aware of the author’s standing otherwise.

Finally, I’m just a guy who finds it therapeutic to write about my work and what I see going on around me. The hypocrisy in this business is astounding. The fabrications are surreal. If someone doesn’t poke some holes in the tissues of lies and misinformation, then it becomes the official story of the business and no one knows otherwise.

An example of what I’m talking about arrives from Kurt Wild, who in a drunken binge went on a rant on and really made a fool of himself. But hey, he has the right to say whatever he wants, just like me. I agreed with a few of his points, but thought he went too far as well as exposed his own lack of knowledge about who and what he was ranting about. No big deal, he’s just expressing his opinion. And for 9 minutes, it was riveting.

But I was shocked when, at the end of the clip (at least, the one I saw; it was stop-motion and had full audio, but I’ve also seen a screencap on that I didn’t catch in the video, maybe a result of the inferior quality clip I saw) he picked up his child and kissed him/her. In this clip, you couldn’t see the child’s face; in the screencap I mention, thesword blocked out her eyes, but you could clearly see that it was a small child, probably no older than 3 or 4.

Cam4 is a sexually oriented site. Their terms of service clearly state the age of majority requirement. Load the frakkin’ site… it’s adult! It doesn’t matter that Wild and the child were fully clothed, that there was nothing untoward. It all comes down to context and according to the Supreme Court’s application of the laws surrounding pornography, the mere suggestion that an image might be sexually exciting is sufficient to constitute child pornography. The Court held:

… that there was no nudity requirement in the statute: “the statutory term “lascivious exhibition of the genitals or pubic area,” as used in 18 U.S.C. � 2256(2)(E), does not contain any requirement that the child subject’s genitals or pubic area be fully or partially exposed or discernible through his or her opaque clothing.

In other words, any picture of a child on a site where there is hardcore sexual imagery constitutes child pornography. This is a topic that really gets under my skin, because gay men are consistently accused of being pedophiles; in fact, I had an disagreement and Twitter & email exchange with JRL about their posting of a story about a man in Las Vegas being arrested on child porn charges, and their rationale for posting the story on a gay porn business news website was simply that the accused is allegedly gay! As I pointed out to them, the last thing we need in this industry is anything that the radical right can point to in order to demonize gay men. A gay porn industry website is just about the last place that should be posting stories about child molesters.

And then, along comes Wild.

I didn’t say anything or even comment on this when I saw it come up first on thesword. At first glance I blanched at the image and thought about writing a post for my blog describing the discomfort I have with any mixture of children and porn. I didn’t want to draw the lines for anyone, so I let it go. Then, Wild began posting on Twitter. I again ignored the matter, hoping it would just go away. Maybe everyone else did, too, but I get the impression that nobody following the matter understood the gravity of this incident. Wild seems to view it only with respect to himself, and nobody disagreed, at least not publicly, where Wild was posting. In fact, it seems that everyone sees Wild as the victim here, and not that he’s placed the industry at risk.

And again, late Saturday night Wild comes on Twitter again and starts talking about it:

Ok, here is what I am sleepless about………..

Blogs posted nasty photos of me, video of a drunk night, and a picture of my daughter on the banners of their sites when she ran in the room


Just want everyone to know how I really feel about the image of my daughter all over the web. That accident wont happen again

And I won’t allow further usage of any of those images AND VIDEO because of the crossing of that line.

And I replied:

@kurtwildxxx The issue is that you broadcast images — that you now claim copyright — of your own underage child in a sexual context.

@kurtwildxxx That’s child pornography, plain and simple. Stupid on your part, and you’d be wise to shut up.


@kurtwildxxx No, I’m trying to tell you that you’d be wise to shut up about the incident rather than continuing to keep on everyone’s mind

which is not to say that the conversation didn’t go on, but this was the gist of my remarks: he made a big mistake, admits it and says it won’t happen again, but then can’t move on. And continues to bring it up in a public forum. Even this afternoon, he confirms that he owns the copyright to these images, tweeting such confirmation from cam4.

Let’s review: Wild is a straight, married father of 3, gay-for-pay porn model who appears in explicit hardcore porn films. There are moving pictures floating out there on the internet of Wild ranting for nearly 10 minutes about various issues in the industry, and then holding up his minor child on a live webcam displayed in tandem with hardcore sexual imagery. Wild has acknowledged his mistake and accepted responsibility for it, and has even claimed that he owns the copyright to those images. Wild correctly expresses his shame in exposing his child through these images, saying “that accident wont happen again.”

Am I the only person in gay porn that sees the peril Wild has placed himself,, and the entire porn industry? And with help publishing the incriminating evidence from thesword no less… republication of child porn, for Christ’s sake! Is this not a recipe for a massive crackdown on the porn business?

Twitter is one of Google’s latest indexing discoveries. Pick any one of your own twitter posts for more than 12 hours ago, and google a few words. You’ll be shocked to see that Google fully indexes the context-rich Twitter, and makes available to anyone looking the context of the conversation, all organized according to keyword.

Let’s look at two scenarios where this might not be to the authors’ benefit. Firstly, Wild lives in a conservative state (the story about the Subway firing was in TN, if I recall) and we’re about to head into a tough midterm election. Anybody want to wager the benefit to the conservative candidate if he went on a child porn eradication crusade?

Second, and I mean absolutely no disrespect to Wild and his family, but let’s suppose that Wild’s wife decides to divorce him and seek sole custody of the children. Anybody want to wager how quickly her attorney could find these images and present them to the court, clearly showing Wild’s possibly criminal negligence, not to mention that he was intoxicated and chain smoking in the child’s presence?

I don’t care about what models say or do, how wild their antics get, who they fucked or who fucked them… but if I can’t speak out about a model putting my livelihood in danger in a drunken rant on the internet, then don’t follow my tweets and don’t read my blog.

But I will not let the record go unchallenged, that nobody cared enough to object to this negligent behavior. I object to Wild carelessly allowing his child to get drawn in to the situation no matter how innocent and unintended, I object to thesword reposting those images, and I object to Wild’s constant inability to shut. the. fuck. up. about it, file the damn DMCA notices to thesword to take down the images, and let’s all hope that nothing really bad comes of this mistake.